They say we see the world not as it is, but as we are. For much of my life, my world was shaped by what I now recognize as subconscious lack. I wasn’t born with this mindset, but like most children, I absorbed it from my environment, my experiences, and the people around me.
Growing up, my family’s financial situation was tight, and I learned early on that money didn’t flow freely. Bills were a constant topic of conversation, and scarcity felt like the undercurrent of every decision. I remember watching my parents struggle to make ends meet, their faces lined with worry. In those formative years, I learned to associate success with struggle, abundance with unreachable dreams, and wealth with something “other people” had.
Although we didn't have everything we thought we wanted as kids, my parents always made sure we had what we needed. The most important was love. They also taught me how to persevere and how to do what is necessary to make sure everything is taken care of. My parents always pulled together to make things work. They didn't have a separation of jobs. They looked at things as their responsibility, not his or hers. They taught me what it is like to keep pushing even on the most treacherous days.
Through this journey I have learned not to blame my parents for this inherent mindset. Instead it gives me a new strength and hope to help them with their mindsets now. They were doing the best they could with what they had, passing down what they knew from their own experiences. What I’ve come to understand is that some of the beliefs I carried weren’t even entirely mine—or theirs. They were inherited in ways far beyond what I could see or understand at the time.
This is where the concept of epigenetic memories comes into play. Epigenetics, the study of how behaviors and environment can cause changes in the way genes work, has shown us that we inherit more than just physical traits from our ancestors. Memories of trauma, hardship, and survival can also leave imprints on our genes, shaping the way we respond to the world. For example, if my great-grandparents faced poverty or war, their bodies might have adapted to scarcity, and that adaptation could be passed down to me, influencing how I view security, risk, and abundance.
These epigenetic memories can feel like invisible strings, pulling us toward certain fears, beliefs, and behaviors without us even realizing why. For years, I carried a sense of lack that wasn’t entirely mine—it was an echo of struggles that came long before me. Recognizing this gave me a profound sense of compassion for myself and my family. It wasn’t about blaming anyone; it was about understanding that we are all shaped by forces larger than ourselves.
When you grow up surrounded by scarcity, you start to live within invisible boundaries. You avoid dreaming too big because disappointment feels inevitable. You operate from a place of “just enough,” clinging to security and fearing risks. And even when opportunities present themselves, you hesitate, unsure if you’re worthy or capable.
But what I didn’t know back then—and what I hope you will be able to understand now—is that this mindset isn’t permanent. The subconscious beliefs we carry are not our destiny; they are simply the starting point. The first step to breaking free is recognizing that these beliefs exist. The next is choosing to rewrite them.
Looking back, I see how that subconscious lack shaped my early years as a mother and business owner. My fear of scarcity kept me stuck in cycles of overwork and self-doubt, even as I built a company that was doing well on paper. I constantly felt like I was one crisis away from losing it all. I made decisions from a place of fear, not faith, and I couldn’t fully embrace the success I had earned because deep down, I still believed it could vanish at any moment.
The turning point came when I began to see the difference between lack and abundance—not just in my circumstances, but in my mindset. Subconscious lack tells you to shrink yourself, to play it safe, to expect failure. Subconscious abundance, on the other hand, allows you to expand. It teaches you to see opportunities instead of obstacles, to take risks with confidence, and to trust that what you need will come to you when you’re aligned with your purpose. For me, this time started in July 2023 when my relationship ended with the man I had 5 children with. We were never married, but I thought we would spend the rest of our lives together. I was a single woman left with 5 small children wondering what next. Codependent since I was able to date. I was 38 at this time. I had no clue who I was as a mother, a business owner, a woman, a daughter. I was lost. My other half might as well have died.
The shift from lack to abundance didn’t happen overnight. It was a process of unlearning, reprogramming, and stepping into the unknown. It required me to face the beliefs that had been holding me back and replace them with new ones. It demanded that I stop living in fear of “not enough” and start embracing the possibility of “more than enough.” I had, what I would consider, a near-death experience in February 2024. I will detail that at another time. What I have found in talking with people over the last year is that this journey seems too often begin with a trauma or a near-death experience.
This chapter isn’t about my story—it’s about yours. We all have a story. Not to be compared with others, but to inspire that we are all a lot more alike than we think. Think about your story. Is there a point in your life that you have switched your mindset from negative to positive to find that the positive thing you had been wanting “suddenly” happened.
There is a universal consciousness, almost as if God/the Creator, your higher power, wants to experience every situation from all angles and uses our physical bodies to do so, but that's also for another time. Where have you accepted lack as your reality? What beliefs are holding you back from living the life you truly desire? The good news is that abundance is already within you. It’s not something you have to earn or chase; it’s something you have to uncover.
I want to share with you how I made this shift and the tools I used to create a life of subconscious abundance. But for now, would you like to take a moment to pause and reflect? A moment to ask yourself: What seeds of lack have taken root in your subconscious? And what would it feel like to replace them with abundance? Have you ever held a belief and then challenged it only to find out your original belief was wrong? What if I told you that if you hold a belief that you hold an inability for success, you are not going to be successful? And if you by chance are successful, there is a big chance of a setback. The key will be to recognize the setback as temporary, not as permanent defeat.
Because the journey to abundance doesn’t start in your bank account or your circumstances—it starts in your mind.
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